BIG misshap from Bing Crosby

I played drums with a show band that performed in many different venues during the middle 70's. During one county fair gig the leader told me a fair organizer needed a drummer for a special show over at the outside amphitheater and that I 'fit the bill' since I had vaudeville experience. Be there ready to play at 1pm.
I got there before 1pm and set up on the stage but no one was around. The audience started to come in but there was no one else on the stage or backstage. Was I at the right place? The leader of our show band came in with the other musicians but they all sat down with the audience. He gave me the hi-sign so I knew I was at the right place.
Suddenly a guy comes running out from behind the stage and said 'Watch the right side in front of the stage and make some sound effects to what you see'. He then ran off to the right side of the stage.
Out of nowhere came a LARGE ELEPHANT walking in front of the stage wiggling it's ears, head, etc. Well, I started imitating what the elephant was doing on my drums. It really went quite well for no rehearsal. The audience loved it, the elephant handler loved it, my fellow band members about died laughing, and I walked away with $25 for 15 minutes work!

last weeks winner, john Wayne

One of our guitar players lives just a couple of blocks from a micro-sized bar and I must emphasize micro. This was fall of 2011. Our band was only a few months old and this was our first time there.
They literally move a pool table for the band and that is about how much room you have to set up. But it's a fun little place with a loyal local crowd that loves to party and packs it in.
About half-way through our gig a crowd of older women come in obviously already enjoying themselves. I'd guess early 50's to some blue hairs. Turned out they were celebrating one of the ladies 80th birthday.
Despite our hard rock repertoire they were loving us and dancing to every song.
At the end of a song the birthday girl politely asked our guitarist if she could say something over the mic. He was like "sure it's your birthday have fun." Now mind you this lady is 80 years old tonight and looks like a typical great-grandma. Well she grabs the mic and screams at the top of her lungs "I AM FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKED UP!" Our jaws hit the floor. That was the last thing we were expecting from her mouth. But everyone was cheering and laughing and after we got over the shock we were laughing too. Man I wish we had that on camera.

This weeks winner; Bob Smith

I was with my bandmates passing through Santa Barbara CA. headed to Orange County where we had a gig the next day. While walking around browsing stores and what not and enjoying the nice day we found ourselves in this huge store that had a little bit of everything including a lot of used items. I ran across an odd sized guitar case that was leaned up against the wall so I opened it to see what it contained. Turned out to be one of those latin style instruments with the courses of 3 strings together, can't think of the name at the moment, but I had never seen one in person and was kinda thrilled and excited to mess with it.
I was plinkin' away and about that time this kinda dumpy old Hispanic man came up and tried to take it from me. He couldn't speak English and though not getting especially angry or too physical he was obviously trying to get it from me. I'm like "Hey gramps, I saw it first". But he wouldn't let up. I finally gave him a pantomime of "Dude, back off". With that he walked away and I look at my buddies like what was that all about. A few minutes later the guy comes back with a younger man that could speak English. Turned out the old man was a street musician and that was his personal guitar. He was friends with the store owner and he would set it in that particular spot when ever he took a break.
I was so embarrassed. I told the young guy to explain what happened and that I was very sorry. He was actually pretty cool about it smiled and shook my hand.
But I got ribbed about that the whole weekend. My bandmates were all "You big bully stealing an old man's guitar".